would appreciate feedback. I think I'm a fairly nice person. I consider people's feelings, I try to do the right thing in regards to human kind, and although I could do better I try not to talk about people behind their backs. Apparently I may be too nice. That is neither here nor there. what I want to know is where is the line drawn. I mean, I want to be assertive and firm in my choices but I want to relay compassion, sincerity, and NICE :) At any rate, I've always struggled with this and although it's improving I would love other's insight. I was raised by two wonderful, caring, giving, NICE people whom probably get taken advantage of because of this but overall I think are praised for their way of living. So, when is it right to be more of a bully about your opinion? when is it ok to say the F word? (ever?) when is it best to sugar coat? some of this is rhetorical banter but seriously...would love people's opinions.
Paisley is over her throw-ups. Lee is too. Griffin and I have been spared so it seems. I sure hope so. We saw Santa this weekend. Paisley screamed. Griffin was skeptical followed by excitement followed by anger when Santa didn't give him the toy right then that he asked for. lol. Anyhow, we are doing well. Getting in the christmas spirit.
Oh, and I'm SEWING! it's fun. Gotta get the dress pattern and fabric soon kelly, don't you worry :)
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I think the most important thing is to be true to yourself, and if that means being nice or not nice, then so be it. If you're not comfortable with your own behavior, then it may be time to take a look at it in that light. But if you are trying to conform to someone else's standards of behavior (whether it be nice or not nice), then you are entering dangerous territory! That may be the time to say the "f" word! As in, "F*** it, this is who I am, and I am the one to live with the consequences." Being nice, though, in MY opinion, is always the better way to go. Just not "doormat" nice. More like,"courage of your convictions" nice.
P.S. I like to think of it as being kind rather than nice. Be kind to others, and for goodness sake, be kind to yourself!!
well, right, kindness is really what I'm talking about but at what point are you becoming the doormat since we all know the world ain't nice. btw, you are possibly too nice too :) and I mean that in the nicest of ways. lol.
((hugs)) I don't know what is going on, but you are perfect just the way you are. You can't control other people & if they're not nice to/about you, it most certainly isn't your fault. They'd probably do it regardless.
Do Unto Others As you Would Have Them Do Unto You.
Take a moment, put yourself in their shoes and then decide if you want to be really nice, understanding or more firm and assertive to stand up for yourself.
If you find yourself wishing you had said this or that and feel like you got the s**t end of the stick, then perhaps you were taken advantage of.
Sometimes it is best to step back, take a few hours or days to think about something before you speak.
And sometimes you just will never get the reply/response/respect you deserve or need or expect and that's when you say F*** it! And you can always say that to your hubby,girlfriends,mother, sister,aunt,etc.
You cannot go wrong following the Golden Rule. It is simple, universal and applicable to any situation.
By the same token, you can still stand up for yourself and be nice about it!
Also, that was so nice of you to say that I am nice. What can I say, You, my dear, put the "nice" in "niece" (that's a Hallmark card, isn't it??)
I would rather be too nice than not nice enough, anyway. Prefer to be a doormat than the crap that gets left on the doormat!! WooHOO!!
nothing is going on. I'm just thinking. A few things have come up in the last week where I've had to be more assertive and buggering through how got me thinking. and then my grandmother told me I was too nice so that got me thinking more. so...just curious what others thought and how they lived.
It is more important to be true to yourself --- I think when you get that stomach feeling sensation that says what a minute I might be taken advantage of. I find it is hard to decide on what is consider true kindness and just not taking yourself into consideration. When things start to bother me --- I usually take time to re-examine the situation -- maybe write down some things and decide if I am giving in too much or just the right amount. And yes sometimes you need to be firm in standing up for yourself but you don't need to get nasty. Just firmly state you beliefs in I statements -- who can argue with how you feel. KWIM - man things like this can be tough.
mary I agree and it is hard not to get angry and even harder to separate that from sticking up for yourself.
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