A couple days off

It is soooo glorious to have a few days off. I am loving every second. The kids have even let me get a bit extra sleep. Right now Lee is off with my mom getting fabric for christmas projects and my Dad is off buying the kids new bunkbed!! I am so excited for that as well. I am sitting on the couch with my kidlets and the dogs, watching Lilo and Stitch. I should probably feed them some lunch but the quiet really is just great. haha.

Happy Birthday Mom

Anonymous Mom's birthday is today ;) I won't divulge her age but I will tell you she looks damn great for it! We will celebrate later with spaghetti dinner and cake...yum.

Happy Birthday Mom!!

Following my intuition

Another thing I believe. I trust my gut. It is usually pretty good to me. The last few years though I feel like it has failed me in some particular instances. I am still noodling on that though. Because, really, is it my intuition failing me or is it me ignoring my intuition and thus me failing it? I don't know but I must figure this out because some of this shit is just getting ridiculous.

Regret

How much regret should one live with? I firmly live my life that the answer to that should be zero. Of course sometimes that is easier said than done. Today I heard news that an old friend from Heinens died saturday. I saw her son the week before and he told me it was nearing the end and she was in hospice. So much has been going on and the kids have been really hard at bedtime. I knew that if I was going to go it was going to have to be that evening. It did not happen. I did not make it happen. I just did not go. Now she is dead. I know logically it does not make a difference whether I went or not but I am still regretful. I am sad for my friend's family. Her youngest just turned 18 years old. He should be enjoying his senior year as student body president, preparing for college, thinking about prom and graduation. Instead he buried his mother today :(

RIP Virginia "Ginny" Gibbons.

Happy 2nd Birthday

Today is the day. She woke me at 6:45 a.m. BUT she slept through the night which rocked. By this point in that day I was already having pretty consistent contractions and my parents had arrived to watch over Griffin. I was still moving around the house, upstairs and downstairs, in and out of the tub, inside and outside. It was a smiley morning.

We will be celebrating tomorrow with cupcakes so today is just another day for her but I know :) haha.

Oh and she got her first present which she totally loved, a baby doll with all the fixins (bib, dish, bottle, sleeping bag, fork and spoon, and change of clothes. She LOVES it!

2 is harder than 1

Paisley turns 2 tomorrow. wow! It is really hard to believe. It seems my babes turning 2 is much harder on me than when they turn 1 like some people. 1 they are still such babies in my mind so it was easy to be delusional that they are growing up: heck they were barely or not walking, still nursing, not sleeping through the night, eating solids but barely, had just gotten their first teeth, were not talking...now at 2 she is so grown up. It is amazing to watch but I am sad :( I am looking forward to continuing to get to know this little girl and watch her and griffin share life as siblings in our family. It is truly a blessing.

We will be making monkey cupcakes on sunday with the kids in celebration and I think Tamara is taking the little princess out this evening for a auntie special time :) I am keeping it small for ease of life and ease on my sanity.

Parenting class

The last 5 weeks on thursday evening I have attended a parenting class hosted by The Family Man. Darnell is a very tall, built black man raised in the projects, played football in college, married since his mid 20s, has 3 boys (24, 22, and 15), is a social worker....I could go on and on but really he is just an amazingly kind soul with a lot of wisdom to share. I learned so much each week and will honestly be sad to not be going in the upcoming weeks. They are considering having another session after january 1st and I really hope they do because it worked so well with our schedule.

Some of the topics we touched on were about happy cup/sad cup, respect, who are we?, are we happy?, are we making our kids happy?, what is a family?, what is love?, love is time and time is money so does that mean love is money?.....

it was a great series. glad I participated.

Morning or Evening Cleaner?

I feel like the "adult" thing to do is go to bed with a clean kitchen, tidied play area, and crawl into a made bed. most evenings though I cannot peel myself off the couch to clean anything. So I have been tidying in the a.m. which is still something but it has gotten me thinking. When Lee and I did the cleanse i had soooo much energy. I could never pinpoint exactly why but it was great and it lasted beyond the cleanse for some time. Apparently it has stopped. So why? I need to noodle on that because it sure would be great to have that extra 0oomph to get us going smoothly into the next day.

Poop Jokes

Griffin now thinks these are hysterical. Like he grabs his belly and it wiggles as he laughs so hard. haha. He was told a poop joke this weekend by his friend Emaline and that went over well. Then today when i picked him up from school he told me he drew a poop worm. I asked him what that was and he replied, "a worm made of poop." and then he laughed hard. lmao.

Yes and No

how could I forget those words? She says them as well. Although Yes is much more like da or ja. she is a german baby.

paisley's words

Just wanted to jot down what I am remembering her saying currently:

Momma
Daddy
dog
ball
Gee (Griffin)
I can't see (for some reason this is said a lot)
Dora (sounds more like Or-uh)
Doggy (sounds like gawggy)
more
outside (side)
There it is! (Air it is)
Let's Go (Ey Go)
Stop
laughing laughing laughing (she doesn't say this she just does it a lot)
num num num for yum yum yum
Tamara (hard to write but she says something consistently)
Grammie (Gammy)
Grandpa (papa)
Kelly (elly)
Colette (ee-ette)
BABY (how could I forget this word?)
Cow (tow)
Sheep
Pig
Duck
Boat
Shoes
Toes
Eye
Blue
Pink

She does a lot of pointing and she knows so many more words, just she is a little timid about saying them. It is funny how she is afraid almost to say it wrong. She has kind of been like that with everything: crawling, walking, talking. She makes she has mastered it before she performs. lol. We are currently working on colors (she knows blue and sometimes pink), body parts, and noises the animals make. This kid loves books so it is very easy to teach her that way.

Future Channel 5 News Reporter?

So we went to Griffin's conference this a.m. and Miss Kathy had not a bad word to report :) She really relayed how much they are enjoying Griffin in their classroom and how much he is blossoming socially and intellectually. It was great to hear, of course. We see it too which is awesome!

Each morning they have circle time and they get to go around the circle and talk about what they did the day before, evening before, or over the weekend. Griffin always sits quietly listening and waiting for his turn. When it is his turn he tells them excitedly what he has to say and then he always ends, "and that is my news." haha. My little reporter.

The other cute thing she had to share was that he really enjoys the house corner. A few of the boys do along with most of the girls in the class. One day he tried on the play wedding dress and he and another little boy twirled in their dresses for some time, feeling the dress spinning around and the air flow up under it. She said she could tell how much he thought it was cool and it brought her back to that carefree time in childhood. awwww.

He is really enjoying drawing pictures. We have several to share from his most recent batch and suddenly all his people have arms, legs, hands and FEET! haha. our feet are the best. If i can figure it out I will scan and share. Along with drawing he likes to dictate the story to them so they will write it down.

At the beginning of the day Miss Tara does weather and the calendar with the kids and she had a pictures of vegetables she put up (I am not sure why but it sparked Griffin's story). Griffin said to her, "I love when my dad sign's up for vegetables because I LOVE Candy Corn." Oh dear. haha. I know he knows the difference but maybe we should refresh him on that. lol.

A new day

I woke up this a.m. to an almost 2 y.o. at my bedside at 5 a.m. I did not get to sleep until nearly midnight so that was NOT enough sleep. Oh well. I was able to lie in bed for another couple hours until suddenly a task popped into my head that i was pretty sure I had not accomplished and it had a deadline. I LOST it. and apparently unnecessarily because the deadline is actually next monday.

I feel so out of control. I am worried about my sister. I am worried about my family. I am scared for the future. I am angry. I am sad. I am mostly just blah. I know this will be a process but I don't want to do it.

Today is a new day though and I am going to not try to control my emotions. Instead I am going to channel them. I am going to push through them to feel them. I am going to begin to process. I will live today because I am pretty sure my sister will feel like she is not today. Maybe I am wrong on that last one, maybe.

Long nonproductive day

I did get some things done today so that is good but it was not my best performance. On to tomorrow. It is yet another day ahead of me and I am going to try for a better output on my part :) It is now late and I am watching the Browns lose miserably on monday night football. It is not important, really, but so often, usually when we are winning, it is so fun to be lost in a sports game. Now I am just thinking about how much I am dreading having tickets to three games in the month of december. brrrr. I am cold just thinking about it. haha.

Tonight Lee and I had a meeting with our finance guy. We bought life insurance which is kind of crazy. We are working on all those very adult things and it is weird. I am an adult. I have two kids. I have a husband. I am a doctor. I am a homeowner. We have two cars, one is a minivan. I mean, really? When did this dream world arrive. lol. I just think it is crazy how amazing my life is and yet I so often forget. I will work on remembering more often.

So we had the meeting and so Auntie Cramra (Tamara) watched the kids for us. I knew they would all have a blast together and they sure did. She also did a nice job of being auntie but not being taken advantage of :) SO, they were in bed and asleep by the time we got home. Yeah!

She said they were really great for her and she loved caring for them. That warms my heart so much. Griffin told her "you make me so happy Cramra". He is too sweet.

Tomorrow a.m. Lee and I have Griffins school conference. It is too funny to think of this as a part of our reality as a parent already. Where has the time gone that my boy is old enough for a conference? Wow.

Not a good night's rest

I could blame this on many things but I had a conversation with my grandmother once that taught me to not worry about why I did not sleep well and just move on with the day and then into the next night's sleep. That is a dramatic over simplification of the conversation but it will do for now. So I am tired today and my mind is a bit all over the place. I have this strong feeling of just not wanting to be HERE, right now. I need to work on that because I am here, right now. I want to crawl in bed for several days, pull the covers over my head, and just be but it will all be here after those several days so there would be nothing gained. Instead I plan to pour into work and home...work hard, play hard and keep my mind busy in other ways.

Mattress Expiring

I am beginning to think we need a new mattress. Ours is only 6 1/2 years old but I really think that I have been sleeping worse and worse and waking stiffer and stiffer over the last year. This has got to be the culprit. Ugh. Alas there are no monies for a new mattress and I had really hoped that when it was time to buy a new mattress we could not only afford to upgrade to a King but we would also have the room for one. Also not possible.

Hmmmm. Will have to start pricing them so we can save our pennies. Aaaah, to sleep comfortably again.

Just when I think I enjoy an age....

I have an evening like tonight. Sheesh. The boy is NOT cooperative tonight. I just don't get it. I even have felt present in the evening and made a nice tasty, healthy dinner. Whatever. I know it is just a rough evening but AAAAAAAAAh. and where is my husband? lol.

"I love you too Momma"

Such great words to hear and from my 2 y.o. no less. Awwww. She is just too sweet that girl. She and I love giving each other kisses, all over each other's heads and cheeks :) And I always tell her I love her and she is now saying it too. Love it.

My friend Andy

Griffin apparently has a friend at school named Andy. He is an actual kid but neither of us have met him yet. I think he either is another part timer or just comes at different times than we do. Anyhow, Griffin wants to invite him for a playdate. The conversation went something like this:

G: "Andy is coming over today. I need to set up my tent for our camp out."
Us: "Who is Andy?"
G: "My friend from school. He is coming over to my house. I asked him before nap time."
Us: "Well, that is great but that is not exactly the order of things. First you need to ask us, then we have to ask Andy's parents."
G: "Please can Andy come over to play?"
Us: "sure. why don't we write his parents a note so we can set up a playdate."
Griffin ran away at this point and came back downstairs with his tent, that he was setting up for the playdate that was apparently going to happen right then. Tears ensued as he did not understand why Andy was not coming over right then.

Us:"Ok. Here is the note. We will put it in his cubby tomorrow so he can give it to his parents."
G: "I want to put it in the mail. then he can get it from his mailbox."
Us: "We do not know his address or his last name so we have to give it to him at school."
G:"Otay."

Then later.
G:"Can Andy take a bath with me?"
Us: "Uh, no. "
G:"why not? He likes baths."
Lee:"Baths are for taking alone or with family only."
G:"why?"
Lee:"because you are with your privates and private stuff down there." (me laughing at the side)
G:"but why?"
Lee:"no, just because. you cannot take a bath with your friend. He can come over to play but no bath."

Then this a.m. very seriously Griffin brought the note in, told his teacher about it, got some tape from her, and put the note on Andy's cubby. Lol.

Wow. what a process. I just hope Andy wants to actually come over for a playdate.

Happy Birthday Isabelle

Our friends Shannon and Steve had their little girl today just shy of 28 weeks gestation. All is well so far. Babe and mom are healthy! Continued prayers and thoughts are appreciated for this new little life. Congratulations to my fellow blogger.

Happy Anniversary

Today is our 6th wedding anniversary. How fun! We have spent the day recovering from illness and doing a little housework. Getting a shower would be great too but that hasn't happened yet...a true pajama day, make that weekend. lol.

I often think about our life on days like today or our kids birthdays. This month happens to have two so maybe I am a bit more reflective. It is crazy how amazing our life is although it is not really how i imagined I guess. That does not make it bad, just different. There are times I think about other couples who waited until their careers were established to have children or until they had more money in the bank. Some days I feel like we chose a harder path for ourselves than needed. But then I think about all we have in front of us each and every day and I just smile. It is how it is supposed to be....and heck how we planned :)

Today on my 6th anniversary I am content. I will cherish that.

On the mend....

Please let this be the end. I really hope we are all healing and that one of us is just going to skip it entirely. please please please.

Sibling Games

so I am sure you all have played the game with a cat where you take a laser pointer and move it around the ground so the cat chases it. Right? We always played in college and the cats seemed to like it but I could not help but think that part of it was cruel because that cat was never going to "catch" the light.

So this a.m. Griffin played this game with his sister and an elmo flashlight. lol. cracked me up. Paisley ran around chasing this, jumping to catch it at times, and generally laughing hysterically because it kept moving. I was pretty sure this game would end in tears but it actually did not. they both seemed to enjoy themselves thoroughly. so funny, my little cat and mouse team.

sick

I am down for the count. I am hoping that a day of rest will be all I really need. Unfortunately even though I feel awful, have a fever, and cannot get around easily (too much energy), i am also tired of lying around. I swear this is an awful side effect of having children, ie. getting older, lol. I used to be able to lie around for days with no ill effect. Now I almost feel worse from the stiff body as I do from the illness. Ah, to feeling better....

Art, Art, and more art.

Griffin has become a little artist at school. He LOVES his projects they have him do and is really improving his technical skills like cutting, pasting, and drawing. It is so fun to watch him explore an aspect of his personality/skillset that he has not before. And he is actually pretty good. Lee keeps referring to him as the "dark horse" since he has never shown interest before and Paisley always has. lol.

So what to do with all these great projects? I mean, I know I will keep some of them, two in particular, but the rest? I cannot throw them away in his presence...god forbid but really? There are piles and piles from the past 9 weeks.

Other than the art he is blooming through school. He is learning to recognize letters, writing, very remedial reading (through letter recognition), and in turn spelling. It is sooo cool. He is still not very interested in numbers. I so hope he does not struggle with math because that can be difficult for children. He has become VERY interested in books which thrills me. He will sit and read to himself at night which is sooo cute! His imagination is soaring. The games he plays crack me up and he is always creating obstacle courses for his little men or animals. Bathtime can occupy him for hours if we let him and this is not about getting clean it is about playing. He has long involved conversations with his men and animals in the bath. Cracks me up.

He really is such a joy. I am LOVING this age. Sure there is still a lot of whining and dramatics but you can reason with him many times. I get so mad at myself when I do lose my cool with him because he really is such a sweet boy.

Not a great day politically....

I usually try to stay out of politics but sometimes things strike you and you cannot help but become involved or emotionally tied. The results of yesterday's election just has me bummed. It makes me truly realize how much our country is still bigotted and focused on the $. It just bums me out. I surely have my own personal opinions of things but first and foremost I want to protect human rights....life rights. It just makes me sad. Plus the beauty queen won city council :( She seriously is just a pretty face...what a bummer.

Halloween 2009

Funny Griffin Story

the background to this story is that Griffin's teacher, Ms. Kathy, makes the kids english apples. These are peeled and sliced apples with cinnamon sugar sprinkled on them. I have no clue why this makes them english apples but Ms. Kathy is a little quirky and it makes Griffin happy so I just let it be at that.

So FF to today. I picked Griffin up as usual. Then we head to get Paisley. Paisley's sitter often makes cookies and sends one out to the car with Paisley for Griffin. Griffin has come to expect it which I try desperately to squash because it is greedy behavior and also because she does not always have a cookie for him and then he is all sorts of upset. Anyhow, today he got one. A Snickerdoodle (oh yum). Do you see where this is going yet?

He is eating the snickerdoodle while I buckle Paisley. He looks down at it and says, "what's in this cookie?" I said, "sugar and butter." He says, " oh look at it. It's English." haha. the cinnamon sugar sprinkled on top. I chuckled.